Friday, June 28, 2013

Clomid Cycle #2

So here we are. . . Cycle one on 50mg earlier this month worked in the eyes of my doctor. The fact that my endometrium responded by building up a layer (and YES, shedding it leading to MY PERIOD on CD27) means my ovaries tried, but just didn't get enough oomph to ovulate. I was just as excited this month as I was last month (if not more) to get my period! No withdrawal meds either to start it!

Now fast forward to Monday, June 24th. We are on cycle day three (CD3) of my second cycle with Clomid. The difference this time is we increased my dose up to 100mg. Does this mean double the fun?  Double the side effects? Double the HOT FLASHES? Only time will tell. Here again, is my day to day experience while taking Clomid!

Day 1:
Monday, June 24th

Mood: Happy
Any tears today: No
Tired or energetic: Energetic
Love or hate husband: LOVE! He just came home from a 4 night Bachelor cruise and I've really missed him! Great timing on his part coming home on day one of this fun! haha
Headaches: No
Nausea: About an 1.5 hours after taking it my stomach started feeling achey/woozy
Hot Flashes: No. . .
Crazy dreams: No
Other symptoms: Excited and hopeful!

Day 2:
Tuesday, June 25th

Mood: Happy, but irritable throughout the day
Any tears today: Yes
Tired or energetic: Mostly energetic
Love or hate husband: Love..but easily annoyed by him (I'm sorry but I can't stand any man when they're not feeling about a boowho party)
Headaches: No
Nausea: No
Hot Flashes: Not last night, actually slept great the night before and actually felt cold a few times! But I am slightly sun burned so overall I feel like a hot flash.
Crazy dreams: I remember some weirdness but nothing crazy sticks out in my memory
Other symptoms:  My optimism has gone up and down all day...worried I won't even ovulate, worried what if I ovulate and can't get pregnant. Worried about how long we'll be down this road. Blah.

Day 3:
Wednesday, June 26th

Mood: Tired, grumpy
Any tears today: Yes
Tired or energetic: Tired
Love or hate husband: Love, but verrrrry easy irritated
Headaches: No
Nausea: No
Hot Flashes: Only a few throughout the night
Crazy dreams: No
Other symptoms: Very emotional, irritable, grumpy, fat.

A funny and educational book for Phil!

Day 4:
Thursday, June 27th

Mood: Ticking time bomb, happy one second, crying the next!
Any tears today: Yes
Tired or energetic: A little bit in between
Love or hate husband: Love, we had a nice day hanging out together!
Headaches: No
Nausea: No
Hot Flashes: One or two at night and maybe one in the day, very mild!
Crazy dreams: Yes, I had a dream I broke into our old house in Denver, haha
Other symptoms: Same crazy emotions, feeling fat.

Day 5:

Friday, June 28th

Mood: Exhausted, irritable
Any tears today: Just barely no
Tired or energetic: TIRRRREEEDDD, not sure how I made it through 12+ hours of work!
Love or hate husband: Love
Headaches: No
Nausea: No
Hot Flashes: No
Crazy dreams: Not
Other symptoms: Nothing new, happy to be DONE!


OH the irony..Struggling with infertility while working in Labor and Delivery

I am finally finished with my second cycle of Clomid. Phew, That. Was. EXHAUSTING! (By the way, is it just me or has June been the longest month ever!) I have never been such an emotional wreck in such magnitude in such a short period of time in my life! This round the hot flashes were not bad at all and at times nonexistent (Hallelujah)!  But my mood and emotions took a beating this round. Those who know me I think would agree that I'm usually a pretty happy, bubbly, energetic girl. I was the complete opposite this week. Moody. Grumpy. Whiney. Discouraged. Tired. Irritable. Depressed. Everything made me emotional yet at the same time I was indifferent to so many different situations and people. Very hard to describe. 

Through all the changes I must say (for the umpteenth time) the weight gain is the most upsetting and hard to deal with for me. I know getting pregnant will change a woman's body forever. But boy oh boy I was in no way at all prepared for it to change this much this soon! I eat healthy. I workout. I'm active. I'm doing everything right and I yet I feel like I'm getting bigger by the second! I've been the big girl, was her for the first 20 years of my life. I've worked my ass off (literally) these last 7 years to stay in shape and keep the weight off. Now, while doing all the same things, my efforts are futile. I will say I am one lucky lady to have a supportive husband who loves me through thick and thin, ups and downs, regardless what pant size I'm wearing or what the scale says. I certainly couldn't do this without out him and his encouragement and love. Thanks baum! 

I'm hoping the worst part is over, but I know it's not. In a few days will come daily (or more) OPK testing (hoping to ovulate), more blood tests, possible ultrasounds, and the worst, waiting. 

As always, praying for strength, positivity and a miracle!  

1 comment:

  1. Hey there, I'm a new follower and thought I'd say hi. I too am part of the IF world and live in Florida (USF area). I am also waiting on a positive opk after taking clomid. FX and baby dust to you.